Bearing the Cost

After a day of having to bear a heavy load, that left me in tears.....I started reflecting.... 

I was thinking back today on this moment several years ago, as I was walking on a forgiveness road,  a rough patch actually.  And I had read this story of twin brothers.  One whose live was a wreck; he was an alcoholic, had been through some failed marriages, was distanced from his children.  The other had quite a nice life, successful career, happily married, a good family life.  

This story hit me like a ton of bricks, because someone asked the brothers the reason why their lives were the way they were and they had the same response:  "growing up with an alcoholic father."

I knew at that moment I really had a choice.  Was I going to choose the road of being bitter or better?  

It was so hard.  I was very bitter.  I struggle with bitterness to this day.  But on this day,  and it was like moving a 2 ton boulder for me emotionally, or swinging around a crane with physical force,  but I took hold of that 2 ton brick of bitterness and I turned it around.  I said,  "no, "   

I                    WILL                     NOT              BE             BITTER

I will allow this to make me better.  Although this was a turning point in my life,  there are still many, many instances that come up where I have an opportunity like this......And I have to choose the high road.  I had a pretty terrible day even yesterday,  having the anxieties attack me and then (of course). rejection from a student compounding that.  But, I can see where it prepared me for today, an even worse day!  I looked up a lot of positive messages and they helped.  Thank heavens I did that!  Also, for my breakfast meal,  I read Hinds Feet on High Places which talks about the Valley of Humiliation.  I didn't know how MUCH I was going to NEED that!  I didn't know I was going to get whacked with a 2 x 4 today!!  I guess God thought I needed a little more 'fire' or fertilizer, however you want to look at it.  

Here are a few "messages" from Pinterest last night:

  

Subliminal Messages :)

 

Do you have those days where it seems everything is going wrong?

Well,  sometimes we have days where everything goes so right,  it's like,  WoW!

I had a weekend like that.  God knows I NEEDED it!   (No vacations to speak of, for a longgg time).  

I usually list all the good in my journal,  but literally this time,  there is tooo much! :)

From fun times with a really good friend (unexpected) to also many unexpected gifts, to unexpected adventures with my brother and getting to relax while seeing beautiful scenery and also unexpected animals.   It was a weekend chock full of surprises!

Ate at "the wolf" in Custer.  Most
amazing bread pudding in the world!
And the main dish wasn't too shabby either!

People just came out of the blue at a gas station to tell us where to eat at!

I KNOW you all know that COVID has been wayyyy too long!

And it's especially noticeable because I'm so excited over every little

thing!   .....for example, a pair of socks hanging in a window.  :)

I adore symbiotic relationships...the birds and the buffalo.   they also look cute! :)

The End.  :)

(There's really more to be grateful for